For Gooding Sake! » Family

A Family Diary – Surviving the Christchurch Earthquake (Part 2)

mrsgooding — Sun, 05 Sep 2010 11:01:20 +0000

Day 2 — aahhhh, it’s Father’s Day today!

To celebrate Father’s Day, Simon had his usual breakfast in bed prepared by Bea. We were going to have a relaxed lunch BBQ at home with our family but with what happened yesterday, we decided to call it off and get together some other time.

Despite the disaster around us, we still wanted to celebrate Simon’s special day so our little family braved the streets and went to Nando’s in Sydenham for lunch.

Friends living up in the hills suffered no damage to their glass fence. Amazing!

We also visited more friends and also had a look around (not the CBD as it’s cordoned off) some of the areas most affected. Lots of damage to older brick buildings like shops and warehouses, some very extensive.

At Porritt Park in Christchurch

Houses with big cracks right through them and playing fields with deep fissures running the length of the fields and sand volcanoes all over the place where water has been forced up through the surface.

Roads cracked, buckled and parts lifted.

A huge area of concrete forecourt at a service station lifted about a metre and the underground fuel tanks tried to lift out of the ground. Some areas have been flooded by both burst water mains and the water being forced up from under the sandy soil. They call it liquefaction and it happens in areas of sandy soil where the water table is close to the surface.

Kaiapoi has been very badly hit and areas of New Brighton and Bromley aren’t much better. Still no power or water in some areas, but thankfully ours was back on later on Saturday.

We are being advised to boil all drinking water though as there may be sewerage seeping into water mains in places.

There are many buildings and homes that will have to be demolished and the infrastructure repairs will be huge. The epicenter was near Darfield and there have been some big historic homes totally destroyed out that way.

Amazingly with no loss of life.

One teenage lad was thrown outside from the second story, as his bedroom collapsed and his Dad had to remove a pile of bricks from him before he could be extricated. He only got a few cuts and scratches!

One of the worst things we are finding is the unease we all have, especially with the aftershocks which are still happening today. Simon hates going outside to the wheelie bin in the dark as he feels that something like a boy man is going to leap out at him. That’s what it feels like and he ain’t like it!

We went around to one of the shelters this evening with blankets as they said on the news that they needed blankets and water containers. By the time we got there, they had to turn us away as they had such a good response. Makes you feel better knowing that all is in hand and they said they didn’t need food donations either as big companies had donated plenty of food.

Interesting that they have said, the quake happened on a previously unknown fault line and Christchurch wasn’t thought to be a high risk as far as quakes go. They are now saying that unfortunately this may have changed and that we may well get more!

Simon says we won’t be buying an old double brick house, that’s for sure!

To be continued….

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Day 248 – It’s Father’s Day! How much do I love thee?

mrsgooding — Sat, 04 Sep 2010 23:44:25 +0000

Happy Father’s Day MrG!

I cannot imagine a better Dad to my beloved daughter.
I cannot imagine a better role model than you, my love.
I cannot imagine a better partner to raise Bea, my reason for being.
I cannot imagine a better shoulder for Bea to lean on.
I cannot imagine a better helping hand than yours, my sweet.
I cannot imagine a better man to protect our daughter from the evils of this world.
I cannot imagine a better mentor to advice Bea between what’s right and wrong.
I cannot imagine a better comedian to make us laugh when we need them most.

I cannot imagine a better way to show how much you are loved and appreciated than on Father’s Day.

Enjoy this special day my darling. You deserve to be honoured and more.
I am so fortunate to call you mine.

Love you untold,
MrsG

I wrote this BEFORE the big earthquake on the 4th. My love for you tripled AFTER the big quake. You were truly a source of calm and comfort. Thank you, my sweet!

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A Family Diary – Surviving the Christchurch Earthquake (Part 1)

ToastRider — Sat, 04 Sep 2010 11:36:42 +0000

Day 1 of the 7.1 magnitude earthquake that rocked the city of Christchurch. Note: The earthquake that hit our city was the same magnitude as the one that hit Haiti earlier this year.

Well, what a day huh!?!

I don’t think words can really describe what the actual quake was like, but it was very frightening, especially occurring at 4:35am and with the power gone, it was pitch black.

Christine's update on Twitter was picked up by SkyNews (image on the right - that's me taking a photo of a road that ripped open due to the big quake

Bea was staying overnight at a friend’s birthday party so it was just Christine and I at home. I must have woken with the huge rumble before the shaking started as I am a very light sleeper.

It was a real roar and Christine awoke just as the movement started. Her phone lit up with the movement so we at least had a dim light while the shaking became more and more violent.

I held Christine tight and just kept saying “It’s OK it’s just an earthquake, it’s going to be alright.”

But I have to admit, I hadn’t experienced anything quite like this before and it just kept getting stronger with the whole house being shaken about and creaking.

I consciously thought of what to do and thought we were best to stay put at there was nothing that could fall on us and even if the glass in the windows shattered, we were protected by heavy curtains.

When the shaking finally stopped we were both pretty terrified and tried turning lights on but of course nothing worked.

Our immediate thought was for Bea, so we tried calling her cell phone, but they didn’t seem to work at first. We managed to text her and she replied that they were OK, thank God.

After a short while we were able to talk to her and the parents of her friend. All was Ok and they had the girls in a small room which was safe.

They were still awake as the girls were still up and listening to music!. After knowing that Bea was OK, I went out to the garage to get a torch. Took a while before Christine would let me leave her as it really was a terrifying event and the aftershocks were almost continuous, with a rumble before each one.

I had a quick look around the garage with a torch and saw one of my big bikes had been thrown over, but luckily it was parked next to a workbench and couldn’t go far. Nothing else major and a quick look around the house also revealed no real damage other than a few things strewn around.

We later found that Bea’s TV and video recorder had toppled off the top of her tallboy, but the TV survived unscathed. Video player was toast, but it was old anyway.

So we stayed in bed which seemed the best thing to do until dawn and then got up to have a better look around and then go and pick up Bea as she had violin lessons that morning. There was no damage outside the house and as mentioned we didn’t have any real breakages inside either, so we set off to pick up Bea from across the other side of town.

We hadn’t listened to the radio or TV as we had no power (or water), so were oblivious to the damage that had occurred in parts of Christchurch.

We only got around the corner before we were confronted with a big split in the road and ruptured water mains.

It was something we hadn’t even considered and now that we had a radio on in the car, we started to hear of the widespread damage all over the City. Bea’s violin lessons wouldn’t be on today!!

Travelling across the city was interesting as all the traffic lights were out and while many roads were fine, there were others that had big fissures and areas lifted upwards.

Man hole covers were witting much higher than the road surface as they had been pushed upwards.

Christine took a photo of me looking at the cracks in the road near home (with her phone) and uploaded it to Twitter while we were driving and later we found I had been on TV!! Sky news had used the photo from twitter in the coverage of the quake!

Anyway, we carefully crossed through the dead traffic lights and picked up Bea. The house she had been staying in was also undamaged, although a new plasma TV didn’t look so good lying screen down on the floor. After this we went across to see if my sister was OK as the phone contact was very poor and intermittent. Luckily they were Ok too and apart from a few cracks in her ceiling area, the house also looked OK.

By this time we were getting the reports of the major damage to many older buildings in the CBD and as the day progressed the enormity of what had happened started to sink in.

After my sister’s, we set of for Christine’s sister’s house who were also lucky, with no damage (they didn’t even lose power, water or their Internet access!) so Christine decided to hung out at her sister’s place (with our good friends, Onie and Peetol) the whole day to watch the news and be with family.

We avoided the CBD area and concentrated on making sure family and friends were Ok rather than rubber necking.

Later in the afternoon I went and checked my lockups, where again I was pleasantly surprised as the damage was minimal. Why all my parts bins in the garage at home didn’t fall, I just don’t know, but they didn’t and that’s all that matters.

To be continued…

We were shaken but not stirred,

Simon

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Day 202 – What Adoption Means

mrsgooding — Wed, 21 Jul 2010 00:18:52 +0000

I love this quote. I just had to share it. Every time I think about adoption, I think about the coming together of the 2 loves of my life:

It has been said that adoption is more like a marriage than a birth: two (or more) individuals, each with their own unique mix of needs, patterns, and genetic history, coming together with love, hope, and commitment for a joint future.

You become a family not because you share the same genes, but because you share love for each other.

- Joan McNamara

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Day 149 (29.05.2010) – My family in New Zealand

mrsgooding — Sat, 29 May 2010 11:59:50 +0000

What does reaching a milestone age of 21 does to a family? It brings together a family from around the country for a reunion of love, fun, celebration and companionship!

I am fortunate to marry into a family that is the epitome of familial love, kindness, support, respect and funny wit and humour.

I *heart* this family! <3 <3 <3

Missing in the photo are my parents-in-law who couldn’t drive up to attend our gorgeous niece’s 21st party due to inclement weather; Simon’s youngest sister, L who is living in the UK and Joel, my ever-dependable brother-in-law who took this photo. Joel was our official photographer at the party.

K’s 21st party was heaps of fun! I ‘danced’ the night away with the young ones and the young ONCE Couldn’t move my body too much. Abdomen still a bit stiff and recovering!

There were funny and special speeches from my sister-in-law, K’s grumpa on the father side and her 3 best friends!

We couldn’t miss having our own family photo.

The kids played pool with Simon as our official babysitter

Bea looking so grown up!

Sisters!

We had so much fun. Can’t you tell?

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Day 136 (16.05.10) – A Toast on your 13th Birthday

mrsgooding — Sun, 16 May 2010 10:24:23 +0000

Over the weekend as we celebrated your 13th birthday, you have shown me what a truly remarkable person you are.

As you and all your friends made a mess over the past weekend’s celebrations, you were the only who showed the initiative to tidy up.

You made sure everyone had fun.

When you had to go to your facial session and someone had to miss out on a having a buddy as they could only accommodate 2 per room, you offered that you’d be that person.

We didn’t ask for it but you gave Dad and I oodles of hugs to say thank you for giving you the best party ever.

I cannot articulate in public what else you have done during your birthday celebration and the kind of maturity you have shown, but I have to tell you that it reminded me why Mum is so proud to have you as my daughter.

I am prouder to be your mother, darling.

With all my love

MUMMY x o x o

P.S. – No, this is not my usual annual birthday letter to you. That will have to wait till your actual birthday.Popular Posts:

Day 117 (27.04.10) – Before I had my Daughter, I had my Sister

mrsgooding — Tue, 27 Apr 2010 01:07:56 +0000

Before I had Bea, the nurturing part of me had my baby sister (and sometimes my elder brother ) to love and take care of.

She is your mirror, shining back at you with a world of possibilities.
She is your witness, who sees you at your worst and best, and loves you anyway.
She is your partner in crime, your midnight companion,
someone who knows when you are smiling, even in the dark.
She is your teacher, your defense attorney,
your personal press agent, even your shrink.
Some days, she’s the reason you wish you were an only child.
~Barbara Alpert

Growing up we fought like cats and dogs as any “normal” siblings would – in our young adult years till the present time, we grew into the best kind of sisters one could every hope for.

I am fortunate to have a family member that I love living close to me – it makes homesickness just a tad bearable.

I can’t imagine not having a sister (or a brother for that matter) – my sister is my connection to my past, the one who never gets tired of reminiscing wonderful (and not-so-good) memories with me.

When I had Bea, my sister along with my brother became one of the surrogate parents – the proud Auntie who took turns waking up at night to rock the baby to sleep so I could get some rest.

When I needed looking after, she was there emailing Simon with “I know you will say I don’t have to but I want to look after and be with my sister in the hospital”

In this world where you are judged by society as to what is deemed acceptable or not, my sister remains a loyal companion where I am free to whine, to rant, to criticise and to scream the house down.

She lets me be my most ugly self because she knows that for me to go back to my normal, happy, sunny disposition, I have to release all the frustrations gnawing inside me.

She may be my baby sister but she is the best defender and ally one can have. Anyone who attacks me would have just gained an enemy for life.

And now, the tables have turned and she needs me this time and I’m there for her. As always.

I hope that at whatever station in life’s journey you’re in whether you have the most wonderful husband/partner or children, you also have someone that you can yourself with.

The one who knows you wart and all and still loves you anyway.Popular Posts:

Day 116 (26.04.10) – Fate cannot be that cruel

mrsgooding — Sun, 25 Apr 2010 22:57:16 +0000

My sister and I have a 2-year age gap. Growing up, we wore identical outfits. People say we look alike and maybe we do.

I am hoping that our similarities end with our looks.

This morning I received a call from my brother-in-law with the news that my sister, Kaye is being admitted to hospital for the same problems as mine. I don’t know, perhaps gallstones run in the family?

Kaye is scheduled to have elective key hole surgery (no, it’s not going to be performed at the Ashburton Hospital!) tomorrow but given the severe pains she’s had over the weekend, they are confining her today to help her cope with the pain.

I feel so sorry for my sister as I know (literally) what pains she’s going through.

What I ask now is for prayers and positive vibes that this time, fate will be kind to us. That the key hole surgery will be a success and she doesn’t suffer the same fate as mine.

Please God. Please.

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Adoption from the Eyes of a 12 year old

Beabubbles — Mon, 19 Apr 2010 00:30:28 +0000

“What does adoption mean mummy?” I remember asking my mum years ago.

“It means someone wants to be the real parent/caregiver of you.”

It was the only explanation she could give me because I was too young to understand what it meant. I probably walked off happy with what I was answered with.

If you didn’t know already, my Mum brought me up for 2 years alone without a husband, apart from the help of my Aunty, Uncle, Grandparents and Nanny. That was until my Dad met my Mum and I in the Philippines when I was only aged 2.

Of course I didn’t remember any of this. When I got to know him more, Mum told me that I called him “Big nose and lellow hair” because I wasn’t used to seeing someone with a nose so big and “pointy”.

Dad and I on the day of my Mum and Dad's wedding

I laughed when I first heard that. My mum told me that Dad asked if I could start calling him “Dad” after the wedding. She said yes and from then on, the white guy with a big nose and lellow hair was known to me as “Dad” or in this case,“Daddy”.

About 1 year later after we had moved to New Zealand, I remember my parents calling me for a family meeting. We never really have family meetings so I was basically mystified by what was happening. I thought I was in trouble so I walked in the room, nervous. We ended up having a discussion about Dad wanting to adopt me. That was when I asked the question:

“Why does dad want to adopt me mummy?”

“Because dad wants to be the real dad of you”

I was really confused because I thought dad was already the real dad of me. That was when they told me the story of what happened. I understood what a 6 year old could understand at the time and realised what they wanted to do.

Probably in the same year, I remember going to Christchurch (because we were living in Rangiora at the time) to meet the judge to finalise the adoption. I thought we were going to meet “Judge Judy” (the Judge on the TV show) But my parents laughed and said “No Bea, this is a different Judge” LOL.

I was nervous because this was all new to me, actually meeting a judge. But the talk was only quite short. The strongest of memories that I could remember was when the Judge asked me a question:

“So Bea, what is the best moment you have had with your dad?”

I remember answering: “When me and dad were in the garage one time when I was helping him, he did a really big fart”

The reaction from my parents was pure embarrassment (especially for my dad) and laughter. I looked at the Judge and she was looking at my dad like “Ok……. Weirdo….”

I couldn’t help but just sit there and look around. LOL

After that I remember celebrating it with my parents. My parents gave me a locket. Inside were pictures of me and dad and me and my mum. I loved it so much. I wore the necklace to the restaurant they took me to. They asked me how I wanted to celebrate the adoption – do we go out to a nice restaurant with just as a family or we have a big party at home. I chose to celebrate the adoption with just my Mum and Dad.

Today, Adoption for me is like really cool because I know that my dad wants to take a big responsibility by being a part of my life. Dad is a great Dad to me. My Dad loves me even when I’m being bad or naughty.

I can’t imagine having any other Daddy.

I don’t look at adoption to be a bad thing because if someone wants to adopt you, it means they want to care for you, and love you heaps and heaps.

It means they want to sacrifice things for you like paying heaps of money for food, entertainment and schooling.

It means they want to protect you and to keep you safe of harm.

That’s why I am proud to be adopted by my dad, or “Daddy” x xPopular Posts:

Day 106 (16.04.10): Bea’s 13th Birthday – The Invites

mrsgooding — Fri, 16 Apr 2010 01:16:27 +0000

So the preparation has began for Bea’s 13th birthday this year.

Would you believe it? This year my baby turns 13? I feel so….OLD.

Anyway, if you know me, you won’t be surprised that I have been planning and preparing for Bea’s party this early.

Bea and I decided that she’d have a sleepover again this year but instead of having a theme based on a movie like Twilight or her favourite cartoon character in years past, this one would have more class to it.

This year Bea is having a sleepover spa party organised by….wait for it, wait for it….yours truly, of course

At this stage, it’s only the invites I’ve done. I designed it myself (not that there’s anything fancy to it), printed on a white cardstock with Bea’s photo in front and the details of the party at the back.

To add a bit of ooommpphh to it, I stuck little silver star stickers on the front of the invite.

I am still thinking about wrapping the invites in vellum or buying little spa accessories to bundle the invite with OR go the ‘lazy’ way and just stick them in envelopes that she could hand out to her friends.

There are so many other things I have to prepare for like the cake, birthday favours, decors and such. These will be the subject of my next update.

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